Alzheimer's a Bitch

Gramps - Mom - Alysse - Me

Last weekend I went home to visit my family, specifically my grandfather who has Alzheimer's.

My mom had called to tell me that he was getting much worse. The kind funny man that I grew up knowing was now angry, physical, and argumentative. So I told her I would make the trip and come see him. I called my brother's and we planned to get together Saturday, go visit him and see what we could do to help.

Well when we we arrived he was just setting there sleeping. My mother woke him up, since it was also almost lunch time. He just stared at us for 15 minutes while we tried to talk with him. We talked with other patients in the memory care unit. We watched one attempted escape, and laughed when she turned herself in immediately.

The only reaction we got from gramps was when mom asked him if he wanted help to go to lunch. He shook his head yes, and then shuffled off with mom to his spot in the dining room. So the body is still there, but the mind is gone.

What do you do to reconcile your memories of the man that was versus the shell that still exists. This decorated war veteran, who I once heard tell a TSA agent when the metal detector kept going off, "that's shrapnel from when the ____  got me in Korea." This is the guy who sang, "I Love to go swimming with bow legged women". Which always got hum called Donald Clarence by my grandmother. This is the guy that took you on your first duck hunt at 4 years old? The guy who stopped taking me to the bar when I was  four because I kept sliding off the stool? Or got you hooked on big american Lincoln's and Mercury's? Was a UAW member through and through?

My favorite story of all time was that he had Carotic artery surgery to remove a blockage. He was waking up in the recovery room, and was being attended to by a sweet young red headed nurse, and grampa was hitting on her and asking for a sponge bath. He kept it up until she was replaced by a large male nurse.

I don't know, but I'm glad my daughter and my nephew's got to meet him and know him prior to this terrible disease taking his mind. Because he is just a shell now. A loved shell, but a shell. I have resolved myself to this fact. Hopefully someday this disease will no longer exist. But for now it does and its a bitch!